Every Rapist Was Himself Raped

[Written around 2004.]

Every rapist was himself raped. Although all were probably raped in body, all were definitely raped in spirit. No one who was not spiritually raped could ever bring himself to rape another. It would be contrary to human nature.

Likewise, every child molester was himself molested spiritually, his boundaries disrespected viciously by those controlling his fate, just as theirs were also disrespected long ago when they themselves were vulnerable and full of passionate need.

Every torturer was himself tortured, every sadist himself treated sadistically, and every incest perpetrator incested. Every vicious prison guard was a prisoner in his own vicious family, and every abusive husband spiritually beaten by his parents. Every sport hunter was himself spiritually hunted for sport, and everyone who derives pleasure from humiliating others was himself once trapped in the cycle of humiliation.

Traumas must be healed if the intergenerational cycle of traumatizing is ever to be broken. There is no other way.

[Added note: As of 2013 I’ve still never met a person with a history of seriously violating others, who, when I had a chance to speak with him or her in any depth, proved this essay wrong.]

2 thoughts on “Every Rapist Was Himself Raped

  1. God knows who kickstarted the domino of the first trauma. Bunch of particularly blood thirsty chimps probably. But does it matter? We are human beings now aren’t we?

    Everyone who chooses to pass on the torture or rape has a choice: to stop passing the pain to others. Especially after they have done it more than once to others. They can choose to STOP. Especially when the child or victim is obviously IN PAIN. They can choose to seek help, to stop their hurtful compulsion.

    Every repeat offender who don’t seek help cannot be excused by their own past trauma.

  2. Spiritually, yes, sexually no.

    There was an experiment where convicted paedophiles were asked if they, themselves, had been sexually assaulted as children. They put what are commonly, but wrongly, called, “Lie Detectors,” on some. The ones without lie detectors had a high rate of claiming they had survived childhood sexual assault. The ones with lie detectors reported it at around the same rate as the general population.

    It is a popular myth that paedophiles have been sexually abused themselves. It does survivors of child sexual assault no favours as people then assume that survivors are at a high risk of becoming abusers and this is not true.

    Paedophiles sometimes use this idea as a way of getting sympathy and refusing to take responsibility for themselves.

    Paedophiles have been traumatised, why else would they want to do things that are harmful and frightening to children and which they must at some level know the child does not enjoy? But in most cases it is other gross traumas, childhood traumas, and not sexual ones.

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