Feel free to sign my guestbook, and share your experience of my website or my work. Note: your email will not be made public, though if you share a link to your website that will be public.
Hi Daniel, I sincerely feel that you have hit the root of all chronic mental illness in humans i.e the flawed family system. I have looked at many therapeutic approaches last many years including cognitive, behavorial, neurolistic, energy healing etc. Most have their advantages and limitations. However your work is unique as you expose the cause of the illness. It only makes complete sense that any problem can be tackled in completeness only from the cause. However how to cure an issue that is denied and taboo in the society. We live in a time of democracy and looking at how issues have been tackled through last decades is using the force of numbers. For example in todays world women rights exist because there has been a strong lobbying from segments in the society for women rights. This was not possible possibly 100 years back. The same example can be extrapolated to many other scenarios as slavery or same sex marriages. I think society will only approve of our concern when our lobbying is strong. Parents have the privilege to be automatically given the label of "holier than cow" and "above judgement". This paradigm surely needs change in today's world. The laws of the democratic society need to accommodate the vulnerabilities of the abused child. The society needs to to be more approving of such children etc. In this perspective I wish to ask you why not start a forum wherein like minded people who have similar views can come together and discuss their experiences. It will be a starting point of such a lobby !!! bye for now Shaun
Hi Daniel, Thank you for putting so much time into helping people. I found your YouTube videos years ago by chance and never heard someone speak as authentically as you. You have helped me a lot. I know you probably get questions all the time, so don’t feel you need to answer but I’m asking if you can give me your opinion. I respect your thoughts over friends, family and doctors. I’ve been engaging in self-therapy since I found your videos about five years ago. I realized that although I’m more self-aware through self-therapy and I’m much more morally conscious and less hurtful to people, I am not any happier myself. I’ve realized after going through years of journal entries that they haven’t changed much. The basic message in them all is I don’t like living. I’ve been to many therapists and it has always seemed superficial and like the therapists weren’t truly touching my inner wounds. After realizing I’m not getting better after years of working on myself, I once again sought out the help of a therapist. I trusted the skill of this therapist because he saw my brother for many years and my brother shares similar thoughts as you and I. He has broken away from family for the most part except for speaking with me. This therapist did not see me at the same time as my brother as he said it was a conflict of interest. This has been many years ago and he is now seeing me. Since seeing him, I feel as if he is touching my inner wounds and it has honestly felt like crap. He has just begun some EMDR therapy with me, and I feel like each session I’m more depressed than I was before. Is this a good or bad sign? He hasn’t done anything to make me question his competency, except that he’s making me feel horrible as we dig deep into my traumas. Is there reason for making myself feel worse and a light at the end of the tunnel or is this putting myself through torture for no reason? Also, what are your thoughts on EMDR? Thank you again for all you do for people. It’s appreciated more than you probably realize.
I completely agree with your ideas about grieving well being the key to recovery or what Martin Prechtel would call re-membering from trauma; literally taking apart shaking things up and putting it all back together as a new person having fully metabolized the grief. We have mostly lost the grieving process and truthfully, we hsve lost pur ability to really powerfully praise and acknowledge thise important to us especially our children and loved ones. As Martin’s Tzutujil Mayan people of Santiago Atitilan Guatemala say “grief and praise sleep together in the same bed.” His powerful talk about Grief and Praise can be heard on the internet and he hoes even more deeply into it in his beautiful book “The Smell of rain on dust: Grief and Praise.”
Thank you for inspiring me to trust my own intuition when it comes to life's path and healing. I have been in and out of therapy and using medication since I was 14 despite my intuition telling me it is not the best path for me. Seeing your videos gives me comfort in knowing I can trust myself and that I am on the right path. I thank you sincerely.
I'm writing a book. It's my only option to deal with the topic of your YouTube video, “Sexual Abuse of Sons by Mothers” as I've found no other way to resolve it in my life. Both my biological mother continues with her version of inappropriateness and blames both me and my ‘inner child’ for it, and my stepmom simply hates boys. She grew up with only sisters. Kids can be taught hate, that much we can all agree on. However, I can't imagine how her childhood went wrong. I believe it was her mother who was abusive, as I've known both parents when they were alive and witnessed very angry and aggressive abuse mother to father - who was one of the nicest and kindest men I've ever known. He had no hate in his soul. With my biological mother, her mother was extremely abusive. So, in my case, I believe both moms had abusive mothers, and they really have their own unreconciled issues for which I've taken my experiences to the level of psychiatric help and my psychiatrist broke down and cried. Alas, I found another dead end in coping with my issues. I'm 53. I have a couple close friends that have both told me, they can see how my life suffers from abuse, and they don't know how to help but be supportive in my efforts to overcome it. I'm writing a book. "Breaking the Cycle". This video helps validate there is actually a problem. Not a surprise to me at all, but sometimes in life validation is key to starting the healing process. Yes, there is a problem, proceed to the next step. In my book, I've also covered that this absolutely is a taboo subject. Of all the jaw-dropping reality TV talk shows I've seen in my time; nobody dare touch this. Ratings would drop off the edge because we as a society can't accept or even conceive of this to be a real issue. I once asked a random person what they thought about all this, relative to my writing - and they said this to sum up how they felt I should manage my relationship with my mom, who lives 1700 miles away: "Well, it's your mom, so you have to go (visit her)". Mothers have exactly what you are saying, a sacred - even holy - immunity. That is exactly how the abuse happens in the first place. Mothers have a LOT of power. Nobody questions it. In my case and from horrific abuse I've witnessed - any thorough questions would have resulted in incarceration. It was that bad. I don't want to ever talk about it because it would resurrect pain for my siblings that is greater than we can bear. But no one asked a single question with severe brutal injuries and in conditions of filth worse than most can even imagine. If it's the only scenario that ever happened in human history, I for one saw it firsthand at the age of 7. No matter what logic tells me, I feel so guilty I did not stop it. I could have been murdered for interfering but if I could go back, I would take that chance without hesitation. End this nightmare and what I saw my brother go thru? How about this is how I feel.... GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH. So yeah, it's a real issue in my life. Try the story of my life. So far, the effects have yet to cease, and hard as I try to be "normal", it resurrects itself in many unexpected ways because nobody knows what happens next - because we simply don't talk about this. So, I'm writing a book.
Dear Daniel, By accident I ve seen the video about the reasons that you have quit psychotherapy! I wanted to say that I appreciated a lot all this truth bomb and I respect you for being such a great and intelligent human!I couldn't comment to the video so I found your linked website just express this. I thank you so much, finally someone from the psychic field says the things as they really are! After a long period of research about psychology and the human behaviours to solve my personal issues and traumas I realised that I got into the trap of believing that I'm sick. I ve been diagnosed with personality disorder -disorder of feeling-bipolar and I saw people stigmatizing me for that especially close people.So with my research I found out that all these personality disorders that the doctors are diagnosing not only are stigmatizing innerly and outerly the people, but they are not solving their complexity of traumas.Because this is the truth everyone is carrying all along a complexity of traumas and they find it really difficult to roll through this life! So thank you for saying the truth out there,you are a real human,a real giver,a real healer,courage to your path I wish as an empathetic person and take care of yourself! Lots of friendly regards Vaia
Hi Daniel! First I would like to thank you immensely for your material on self therapy it has helped me to discover a painful truth about my past. I was sexually abused as a child by my father. Now that one is aware of ones trauma and can try to choose different actions aren't this actions also a reaction to the past?I feel like when I was unaware I was acting out past experiences on an autopilot now that I'm aware I still in a sense am controlled by the past experiences. So do you even have a free choice?If I am aware that I self abuse or reenact because I was abused than if choosing not to abuse also is a programming due to the past?Or is this a form of self sabotage? Hope it makes since it is really hard for me to put it in words. All the best!Love and healing from Sweden.
Hi Daniel. I couldn't have stumbled upon your YouTube channel and website at a more perfect time in my life. You are so inspiring and original it is refreshing to see. Thank you for your brutal honesty and for telling it like it is. I have suffered from anxiety/panic for years and have had terrible experiences with "the system." You made me realize that I do not have to hire a therapist and that I am capable of doing the introspective work myself. I just had a terrible experience yesterday meeting a new therapist who tried shove meds at me and essentially fired me for not agreeing to take them. You are truly an inspiration. I am in awe that someone could have such a positive experience on me overnight. Thank you!!
I am new to this site and to your methods of healing. I have dealt with depression all my many years . Now , at 85, after many forms of counseling and therapy, I have found that works best for me is the practice of stepping out of my suppositions and usually corrosive thought processes and seeking another reality than the one that causes me to be despondent and suicidal. There is a reality beyond the one we create for ourselves that strives to justify depression and binds one to the constant task of "licking the wounds" . I realize that is a work that is always in progress and that I must revisit the methods that keep me somewhat "sane" I will try to attend some of your talks in Cincinnati , though the movie on certain drugs does not interest me as I have liberated myself from all and any medication for depression and have never had to deal with psychotic problems.
Dear Daniel, thank you for your answer in 2016 when I was also reading you (It was about gender issues in connection with your thought of celibacy). I am from Budapest, Hungary. Thank you for your posts, I find them helpful. I am just starting jurnaling with the help of your instructions. If you have time could you please let me know that is psychography a form of dissociation as well? Thank you for your answer in advance! Emese
Hi Daniel, I follow you regularly on youTube, and I have seen a couple of your films. I have been attempting (for the past decade) to advocate for healing options that do not involve coercion, humiliation, or use of medication to "control" another person. Thank you for your inspiring work -- which I also find to be an accurate presentation of what often occurs in our mental health system (at least in the U.S.). I am currently licensed as a mental health counselor, but I am far from satisfied with the general direction of "mental health" (whatever that really means??) treatment. I would love to have a conversation with you some time about some work that I am doing in Utah. Thanks again!
I'm a huge fan of you! Your bullshit song is ingenious, I've just been listening to it over and over again.
I just watched Open Dialogues and Healing Homes. USA life seems so fake now. Authenticity, common sense and humanness is out of the window. Your work is transcendent Daniel. Thank you.
Hello daniel having read towards truth book i wanted to read your memoirs i finished five weeks to china and up the west coast of australia. I ordered them from amazon and read them both within two days, im left handed too. Very honest writing. I really enjoy reading memoirs.
thank you Daniel.
Hello, Daniel! I have discovered you recently and watched almost all of your videos. I am trying to find my own path of healing right now with little outside support and I find your work tremendously helping. Not only the value of your content appeals to me, but you, as a person, have a calming and exciting way of communicating your ideas through your gestures and facial expressions. I relate to you on many levels and I can't wait to see more of your work!
Dear... I looked at your video and was fascinated that there is a way to help sick people without medication. My son has always wanted it and has always refused medication. How could I get the addresses of such families? Is this also possible for German? Unfortunately in Germany there is no such wonderful foundation and my son is now suffering from medication. Please help me! Sincerely, Mila Luther
Hello! What’s your opinion on Albert Ellis? Could you make a video on this? 🙂
Dear Daniel! I watched your youtube videos and want to thank you for sharing your philosophy. Your thoughts on family, personal growth and everything else are very interesting and touching. It is like meeting the only honest person among fake ones. You feel things so deeply. You are the first person who acknowledged that all sorts of stuff happening in the world is wrong but considered by society as normal. Family lies, living live with false purposes etc. I am also having issues with my family and at 30 I started to see how delusional my parents are and how miserable they made me. There was no “big trauma”, but they belittled me constantly and ignored me and want me to earn their love with “right” behavior. And I used to hate myself so much and blame myself and feel that everything was wrong with me. It took years to overcome it, to start to love myself. This was so frustrating to hear from everywhere: my parents are great, I love them, my mom/dad is the best person in the world. I thought: why I did not feel that way, but now (after watching your speeches) I am realizing that they all (or most of them) are dissociated from their own feelings. They prefer to believe happy lies rather then to see things in a real way, because it is painful. I am glad that I am “not crazy” and I am not alone, that other people too feel that their family is a prison, is a cult, as you named it. I do not know how to express my gratitude to you. It is very brave to be true self. Please know, that we, people from different side of a screen, love you and wish you all the best. To defeat your fears and to grow more in any way you choose - as a musician or filmmaker or else. I am glad I have found such a great person in the Internet. Good luck.
Hi Daniel. I just want to thank you for being strong enough to make videos about childhood trauma. I'm 21 and I've been isolated by my parents but you make me feel less alone. You're very important.
This web-site is awesome. Thank-you for being a responsible citizen and speaking out. My dad has a twitter account with millions of followers in Dunwoody, which has tons of wealthy influential people who are mainly republican. He talks politics. I don't have a blog. I was recently accepted into a masters of counseling program at the University of Cumberlands. This website doesn't make me want to proceed with that too much. Maybe i'll go for graphic design instead. I feel just as empathetic as you do and I don't think I could deal with treating the mentally ill any worse than they've already been treated. Have a good night and please keep sharing your experiences. I don't feel I should put you on a pedestal, but I do feel you are a good example of a more fully actualized human being. I think as time goes on people will more and more see the truth of your words.
Dear Daniel, How do you manage to live in the 'civilized' world? How do you manage to not get retraumatised by others? Thanks
And I spelled my name wrong in the "from"section of my previous post. Fail!
Hey Daniel, love your work and would hopefully love to visit new York and have coffee with you or something some day. For now I want to know your thoughts on how to know when/if we are lying to ourselves and why do we do it. And when we do it what perpetuates it? Thank you for all you do, from southern Ontario Canada. -TK
Thank you for sharing your voice with others. Your clarity, insights, respect, and compassion are inspiring. Far too many therapists use counseling sessions to direct clients rather than genuinely supporting healthy growth. I am very grateful that you've touched my life.
Dear Daniel, Your video today really affected me. I’ve watched your content before, mainly for your thought-provoking critiques of the mental health field - frank, original and, at times, bleakly humourous. Well done for the great job there. I continued to watch for your raw truth, because in some intangible way it showed me I can speak my truth too. I can be vulnerable too. How is it that somebody on YouTube can practically permit me to be myself? I imagine if growing up I had that from just one person…I would have been flying. So, today I was crying before you even got to the poem. Tears of relief to hear it wasn’t just me. And I remembered deciding to wear that heavy monkey suit when I was in a similar position to you, as a private school scholar from a working-class background. And warning my adult self to never judge me for that decision, because it couldn’t have been any other way. In short, your honesty is contagious to those of us who can smell BS even - especially - when the BS starts to infiltrate our own selves. I’m probably around the same age you were when you quit being a therapist and I’m about ready to do the same as a pharmacist. Any benefit I’m giving to patients on a personal level is drowned out by being a cog in this messed up system, and you amongst others have woken me up to it. Anyway, you should know you’re making a real difference out here 🙂
I find you fascinating and true.I am gradually working my way through your videos.Thank you so much for sharing.xx
Thanks Daniel. What I'm writing it's not a spam. I've watched many of your videos. What you bring up is a kind of challange which I appreciate. I'm a therapist and still think it was a good choice. But I value your criticism. All best!
Dear Daniel, Thank you for creating this forum. It’s the best on the web. And many special thanks for calling out psychiatry for what it truly is - nothing but hogwash, filled with toxic thinking and poison pills - truly an abomination of warped ideology, and a sick suppression of vulnerable human spirit. And thank you for your many videos and essays on psychotherapy, as it too can be just as harmful. I never thought I’d come across be a therapist wise enough and brave enough to see and publicly name psychotherapy’s potential downfalls. The other day I came across the term “spiritual abuse”. And while I don’t like to use the word “spiritual” because of its religious connotations, I think the definition could include psychiatric/psychotherapeutic abuse as well. These abusers seek to destroy people’s self confidence and self trust, to discredit their common sense, to talk people out of trusting their own intuition - to trust the therapist/pastor/counselor more than themselves. Your advice is the opposite - you advise people to trust their gut. Thank you for this. Hearing this from you, a licensed professional, has helped me more than anything. You gave me permission to trust myself, and I needed permission. Thank you for this. I’ve yet to figure out how or why anyone in their right mind would ever claim to think they know what anyone else else truly thinks or feels. And they never doubt themselves. How sick is that? I think most therapists are by far the the most arrogant and egocentric people the world over. I have found that Self- therapy based on your books, videos and website to be helpful in many ways large and small. Truly healing indeed. All my life I’ve sensed that upbringing affects people into adulthood, but I never realized how much and profound it can be. Childhood trauma really is where it begins. For the most part I tuned out this thinking because I found most, if not all, psychotherapists’ manner to be smug and conceited. No humanity or humility at all. They never doubt themselves. It just made me feel worse. I think more than anything people need to find a way to trust themselves, to trust their gut, to believe that if they know something themselves, that’s enough. Otherwise there’ll be no peace. And moments of peace, however faint and fleeting, can be the beginnings of, or retclaimation of, some kind of joy. Psychotherapy wasn’t helpful. It just wasn’t. All I felt was more confusion. And I don’t need to figure it out. I gave it enough time and chances. It fosters dependence, and that’s not good. People need trustworthy relationships. It’s called friendship. Even kindness from total strangers can be remarkably healing. Most of all, reading and hearing your good, sound and compassionate thoughts has been transforming. I just wanted you to know how grateful I am. And I write in hope that it miight help someone else. maria
Just finished the towards truth book i am happy you are trying to make a difference in the world through your books podcasts and vidros very inspirational. I look forward to reading more of your books.