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298 entries.
Stephen Stephen from Flint wrote on November 14, 2018 at 7:16 pm:
I stumbled across your work on YouTube the other day. Watched The 'Critique of Jordan Peterson' Video. I find your 'Environment inducing behavioral dynamics' theory to be correct because it was a thought I had always had myself. I study Mathematics from home which led me into doing a lot more research into Clinical Psychology and The Neurological Sciences. If you ever have the time to discuss the topic further I'd appreciate hearing someone else's opinion. Thank You for the Work,
Vince Vince from San Francisco wrote on November 11, 2018 at 6:40 pm:
Hi Daniel. I stumbled upon your block and your work when I was searching for Alice Miller on YouTube. I must say your critique of Alice Miller, especially the interview you did with Martin Miller, has caused my faith in Alice Miller's preaching to crumble. I was abused severely by my parents and paternal relatives for the first 15 years of my life and they continued to try and control me for the next 15. My therapist has been working with me on my trauma by referencing to Alice Miller's work. After reading your critique (which echoed with my own thoughts greatly at various points), I am growing more and more afraid to go down this path. If Alice lived a dubious life, could I really trust her? I cannot deny I have been feeling better but this shadow of fear is growing to cloud me more and more. Thank you
Claire Chang Claire Chang wrote on November 6, 2018 at 11:38 am:
Writing again here just to say loving your new set videos. Truth thank you! Maybe a decade + after I biding your content, you continue to provide actual help, however variously defined.
Vicky Vicky from Muskogee wrote on November 2, 2018 at 9:15 am:
Thank you Daniel for your great video on forgiveness and your other videos! I am on board with what you said about forgiveness. I will never forgive my parents and my cousins sexual abuse of me growing up. Telling someone to forgive is another form of gaslighting and tyranny. I agree with you that those who push forgiveness refuse to deal with their own trauma. Why would someone want to forgive those who people committed heinous crimes? My parents had no remorse for the damage I suffered.
Erin Erin from Toronto wrote on October 30, 2018 at 5:07 pm:
Just a question: I watched your video on why you quit being a therapist. And I am one of those clients you spoke of who, though in the most pain, have been rejected by therapists because I have the least money (on Disability). So, after two psychiatric stays, I've been delivered right back into the hands of my family who harmed me in the first place. Terrible, terrible irony. So my question: How do I keep from jumping out a window?
Fi Schofield Fi Schofield from London, UK wrote on October 24, 2018 at 8:57 am:
Hello Daniel, I appreciate your pure music and fabulous videos, and your courage and honesty in challenging and illuminating the injustice, ignorance and confusion to be found within the mental health arena. Lots needs to change, and I see you as a peer leader. I hope that you will continue to have many many followers and collaborators, and that lasting change for the better will also follow you - indeed, catch up with you. As for me, I hope that I will find the courage to continue my struggle to be open, honest and courageous. I hope to continue to look to your web resource for encouragement and support. Best wishes, Fi
Matthew Matthew wrote on October 21, 2018 at 1:02 pm:
Hello! I just listened to a podcast on Mad In America where you were interviewed by Will Hall. You spoke as to why you worked with people who were labeled psychotic or schizophrenic. I've always struggled to answer that same question when asked during a job interview. I, like you, can relate to the underdogs, the rebels, and to the one's that have been put down and stepped on. I recently graduated with a Master's in Counseling Psychology from California Institute of Integral Studies, which is a very progressive school. My last year as an intern I worked in a step down or transitional home for people with "Severe and Persistent Mental Illness". I loved it and hated it. I hated seeing how the system created a revolving door for the community's most vulnerable. I hated seeing people given two options, take your meds, or get out. That was abuse, and I actually filed an Elder Abuse claim against the supervisor. I too was not popular at this site. Most of the people I worked with were homeless, so they’d end hospitalized, medicated, "stabilized/ tranquilized", then released back out on to the streets, all to repeat again. What I loved about the work was developing a connection with the residents. Basically the only "technique" I used was empathic listening, along with believing them. I didn't tell them that what they were experiencing was not real. I invited them to describe what they were seeing or hearing. I remained curious and open. The feedback I received was profound and precious. Most said the same thing, that they had never felt more heard or listened to. After listening to your experiences in that interview, I knew I had to try and contact you. I want to do therapy with people who have "psychosis". Do you know of any organizations where this can be done? I am willing to travel! Or maybe a private practice? I have very few hours towards licensure, and as I write this, maybe the best thing to do is work for the least re-traumatizing organization so that I can get my license and start my own private practice. I know you got burnt out doing the work. I expect that may happen to me as well. Thanks for doing the work you did, and for also sharing your experience. It's been inspiring. Warmly, Matthew
Es El Jay Es El Jay from Berkeley wrote on October 16, 2018 at 3:30 pm:
thank you.
Kellie Strubinski Kellie Strubinski from Sierra Madre, California wrote on October 13, 2018 at 11:50 am:
Daniel, I am inspired by your brave, mental clarity. You are a gem. I feel so lucky to have happened upon your YouTube channel. My best to you, Kellie
JP JP wrote on October 12, 2018 at 1:30 pm:
Daniel, I can't thank you enough for your output of work. Can I ask: when a person is feeling pains in the body clearly due to the surfacing of trauma, what is the best way to sit with this pain? Do I simply observe? Do I ask it questions? Do I find the questions through writing? After a lifetime of neurosis, in this past year I've been able to let discomforts expand without necessarily seeking, enclosing, emphasizing, and analyzing them. If context helps to flesh out my question: yesterday I was juggling--practicing in front of a mirror, and I looked into my eye's own reflections, and asked out loud "what is it I really want?" Not long after, I started to cry, and utterred "to be out of this pain." Not simply was "something" surfacing, but dormant awareness of something was surfacing. Since then I've felt a discomfort in my groin (to be blunt, as if my penis has been cut [nothing testicular, however.]) The pain has been highlighting itself on and off today. I can tell some shift has taken place, and I want to approach it in an appropriate manner. Any insights would be greatly appreciated.
Karen A Van Lieu Karen A Van Lieu wrote on October 4, 2018 at 10:40 pm:
I just listened to you video on forgiveness, and honestly Daniel, what you are describing is a form of denial with a "righteous" label put on it. God forgives us but never without dealing with the sin that alienated us from Him. To be reconciled to God does not just mean that He does not count our sin against us, but that He fundamentally changes us to be like Him. This is a great mystery. God vented all His just anger at our sin on Jesus to make a way for our forgiveness, redemption and restoration. When some one hurts me, I need to honestly acknowledge that and process it. When it is tempting to demonize some one for hurting me, I remember my own sin that hurt God so much. I remember how terrible His wrath is, and I think, I am hurt and angry, but I really do not want to see them suffer that much. Then I see them hurt and broken like me. I accept that God has allowed the pain that they caused me for a good reason. Then I am ready to seek a healthy reconciliation, but it takes two to reconcile. If they do not accept responsibility and respond in a healthy manner, that has to have consequences. Even God who forgives those who trust in Him disciplines them as a loving father that they might become holy as He is holy, without sin. Daniel, I am so sorry for the pain that you have had in your life. You are right to sever you relationship with your parents ( they killed it ). Thank you so much for staying true to the truth and for giving sacrificially of yourself for the healing of others. Your authenticity is a miracle. Not because it is easy ( which it is obviously not ), but because it is so rare and beautiful. Isaiah 63:9 If you have questions about what I have written, I have lots of time. Thank you for your kindness. ~Karen
Andrejka Andrejka from Missoula wrote on October 3, 2018 at 12:03 am:
Your work is so relevant, needed, original and inspiring.
Fiona Robertson Fiona Robertson from Nottingham wrote on October 1, 2018 at 9:09 am:
Hi Daniel A friend of mine shared two of your videos with me and I'm really resonating with what you're sharing. It is great to hear someone else talk about some of the stuff that I've been talking about (I've just written a book about the dark night of the soul, or the process of becoming real.) I look forward to watching and listening to me and would love to connect at some point if you're inclined to. Warmest wishes Fiona
Chris Chris from New Jersey wrote on September 26, 2018 at 3:25 pm:
Hi Daniel, Been enjoying and benefitting from your content for a few years. Allow me to return the favor and offer a book recommendation. Next to Alice Miller, the most influential author in my growth/healing journey has been Robert Bly. I have read “Iron John: A book about men” and “The Maiden Kind: the reunion of masculine and feminine.” Both are excellent. He synthesizes brilliantly, in his own gorgeous mythopoetic style, insights from depth psychology and mythology. Come to think of it, I don’t care too much for the term “mythology” anymore because “myth” is associated with “unreal”, where the Truth is that “mythology” is a living, breathing phenomenon. Interesting. Anyway, Take Care.
Alison Alison from Portland Maine wrote on September 17, 2018 at 5:45 pm:
I recently watched your video "why I quit being a therapist" and it helped me in terms of being in the process of quitting my job-though I am not a therapist, I have worked for 13 years in homeless shelters/domestic violence, supported housing for "chronically" homeless, and briefly in mental health, with people who have experienced extreme and often chronic trauma. While not in a clinical capacity I have often been in the position of crisis worker as I was often on the 'front lines". I agree with what you said about the MH field, the liability focus and drudgery of many people in the field. Overall I have loved the work I've done but am taking a break-perhaps for good. Stomach problems, feeling too drained, etc. now I am going to do all the yoga I want, backpack and hike and eventually find a way to do something that feels meaningful again. But it is a bit of a loss of identity which is king of ridiculous. day three of unemployment! in a coup;le weeks ill prob start cleaning hotel rooms or something. Here's to breaking free! "let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pool of what you really love, it will not lead you astray"-Rumi
JS JS from new york city wrote on September 16, 2018 at 6:23 pm:
Just came out of social work school and started working in the city... your video "Why I Quit Being a Therapist" is playing as I write this and it's ringing a lot of bells for me. Your comments about parallel process w/r/t supervisors simultaneously pathologizing supervisees and clients is exactly what I've been experiencing, from my field placements to my current job. It's recently been "suggested" to me by my supervisor to 1) teach one of my clients about boundaries because he's "creepy", 2) consider that one client who is personable and likes to talk with other staff is actually just manipulative, and therefore has a personality disorder, and 3) to find a way to medicate a client who doesn't want it, but insurance won't do X if he isn't participating in psychiatric services so... It's an iron hand in velvet glove industry - no surprise there - but I'm actually less confident about being able to navigate this game than I was when I was working outside social services, in a more "cutthroat" line of work. Thanks for being on the other side and open about your experiences. Helps me to see that the current tunnel I've entered doesn't necessarily have to go on forever!
Elle Elle from Osaka wrote on September 12, 2018 at 7:54 am:
The song video of The Seeker’s Ballad is really lovely and that song will stick in my mind along with the image of the walk that turns into a dance. It was very interesting watching your vid about stopping being a psychotherapist too. Thank you! I mainly stick with comedy these days but I’m glad I happened on your channel. Have you seen Martin Shaw of the Westcountry School of myth annd storytelling? He would love you cos he is wild truth too.
Roy Khater Roy Khater from Santa Monica wrote on September 9, 2018 at 11:44 pm:
Daniel: I have some thoughts I'd like to share that I feel are very relevant and fundamental to overall human development and self-mastery. Perhaps one of the most overlooked, or at least underrated, aspects of human life and behavior is "socialization." Social identity precedes self-identity. Social consciousness precedes self-consciousness. To master and fully realize self-identity and self-consciousness, social identity and social consciousness first have to be mastered and fully realized. All living animals in nature are similarly endowed with a certain degree of social consciousness. But, unlike humans, they do not have the capacity for self-consciousness or self-identity. Before self-consciousness and self-identity can be fully realized and mastered, the deepest realities and truths of human socialization and human social existence must first be fully comprehended, internalized, experienced, emotionalized, and then ultimately mastered and manipulated in the service of self-realization and self-consciousness. As far as psychology is concerned, "social psychology" is one of the most important, fundamental, and relevant realms of psychology to be explored. The profound, universal, and historical process of socialization that an evolving organism is subjected to on its path toward sophistication and superiority is, for whatever reason, marginalized and diluted as an object of analysis of human behavior and human nature. The modern experience of "individuality" is historically novel, and we're most likely just barely scratching the surface of human individuality and emotional independence. Again, I believe that most, if not all, natural human "pathologies" are, directly or indirectly, related to the issue of socialization. If I permit myself a dramatic and speculative example: Take Jesus Christ, and his doubtless complex relationship with his Jewish people at the time. The Jews were (and still are) the most "socialized" group of humans in history. For reasons that perhaps aren't entirely clear, and that are much better suited to a scholar or expert on Jewish history or Jewish life, the Jews' long history is such that they collectively subjected themselves to a profound, severe, and even pathological degree of social cohesion and social connection among, within, and between themselves as Jews. And I think this process (of "socialization") finally culminated in a social convulsion and rupture within Jewish life, and that social convulsion and rupture was Jesus himself. It was almost as if the Jewish people had reached some kind of social limit or social boundary, or some kind of social cliff edge, among and between themselves, as the product of their long and self-imposed hyper-socialization. A type or personality or character like Jesus could only have emerged from a community of people like the Jews. Why? Because he could only have emerged from a place and reality and experience of profound, severe, and pathological socialization, of "over-socialization", whereby some element of natural "individuality" was repressed, suppressed, or constrained (and which, remember, can only be constructed on top of socialization, even perhaps at the expense of socialization). The connection and relationship between human psychology and human socialization is, I strongly believe, so deeply entangled, that it's almost impossible to separate them as processes. There are so many different dots to connect here that I simply don't have enough time right now to go through it all. But, I'd like to again restate the most fundamental point here, that hopefully partially reveals and exposes the nature and truth of human self-identity, self-consciousness, and self-realization: Technically speaking, socialization and social identity and social consciousness form the natural basis and foundation of self-identity and self-consciousness. If the former aren't fully mastered and seized, the latter can't hope to be.
Sandra Sandra from Tuzla, Bosnia and Herzegovina wrote on September 9, 2018 at 12:54 pm:
Hi! First thank you for sharing your experience in the video "why I quit being a therapist". It looks like you did your work in that area and you did GOOD! I'm also a social worker and therapist and feel many of the things you wrote. The mental health system in my country is still not that bad. There is no regulation, which is bad, but I can be more free and less pressured by system. That means that there is more pressure inside because I need to watch and self regulate. Beside therapy I have many other obligations (other job, family) since I don't work full time in private practice. That certainly helps to have space and time to change focus. I've heard many stories of horror from my clients. I held them, some tears escaped, some nights were not slept. I also believe that there is no way a therapy can heal if the client doesn't feel that you are there fully. Being distant and not affected is not just impossible but wrong. One thing that kind of protects me is the fact that I have so many personal horror stories, from which I have survived and healed, largely thanks to therapy that sometimes was not even that good. I continued to go so I got something. This helped personally but provided lessons for me as a therapist. What I strongly feel is lack of support and the same problems regarding clients with difficult problems and no money are finding me more and more . Unfortunately, healthcare in my country does not cover psychotherapy so you can imagine how this goes. Working in totally dysfunctional society, dealing with war traumas on all levels, many social problems and challenges I wonder when will I start thinking about career in lets say gardening 🙂 With all that said, I still enjoy it very much and it gives meaning to my life. I just wanted to chat with you with this entry. Good luck with your work, from what I saw on your web page you still do therapy 🙂 Just listening to you was therapeutic. It provoked the best remedy there is "I'm not alone". Thanks!
Luisa Luisa from Kutza wrote on September 6, 2018 at 6:43 pm:
Hey Daniel, let me introduce you to myself, I'm Luisa from Berlin, ex psychology student and artist & songwriter. I saw your video on why yiu quit beeing a therapist I was really inspired by an idea that came to my mind, it was so obvious to me, that I actually think, that you might came to that idea yourself: Pls make a documentary just about traveling and talking to people. Call it truthtraveler. Put it on Netflix. (Like 'the dark tourist' just seeking the truth of humans) - One of my friend and colleage is a pretty good music supervisor and I am deep into music business, so if you ever wanna do it....I am game regarding the musical outfit. That was my little vision I wanted to share with you. Great work and keep on doing what you do, you're doing it great. Greetings from Berlin, Au Revoir Luisa
Scott Scott from Sydney wrote on August 31, 2018 at 8:57 am:
Hi Daniel I just want to say thank you for being such a compassionate professional. Good luck on your journey through life
Gregory Golden Gregory Golden from Boca Raton wrote on August 30, 2018 at 8:33 pm:
Dear Daniel, Thank you so much for putting together the documentary on treating psychosis in the context of a supportive family. The honesty that you have regarding your own motivations and experiences provides an opportunity for your viewers to let down their guard and communicate about the truth as it relates to the practice of psychotherapy. So much of what you say is on the mark. Thank you so much for everything. Greg Golden, Psy.D Psychologist Boca Raton, FL
Jennifer Ese Jennifer Ese from London wrote on August 24, 2018 at 4:23 pm:
Dear Daniel, I respect your presence on Youtube so much and have been so inspired by your film on Schizophrenia. I want to thank you for all the content you have made on mental health. I am starting my journey on healing from childhood and recent traumas, and will be attending one to one therapy very soon. Once I'm healed, I know I will look back on your videos knowing that you contributed to my personal healing. I'm only 20, but I strongly resonate with your content and I'm so thankful and grateful to the universe that I found you. You are a very special guy, and I wish you all the best on your journey to enlightenment. Hopefully we both can make it. Lots and lots of love from London!!
Lefteris Lefteris from athens wrote on August 15, 2018 at 9:30 am:
Can i verify i resolved my traumas by not dreaming anymore distorted (from censorship) dreams ?
DAVID ALLEN DAVID ALLEN from McKinney wrote on August 6, 2018 at 2:28 pm:
You might like this; THE BIG PICTURE MY THEORY OF EVERYTHING (7-5-2018 and last updated 8-6-2018) dallentx@msn.com HUMANS OR HOMO SAPIENS ARE: • Humans are intelligent great apes. • We evolved from many different and some now extinct species as hunter gatherers over 6 million years and only in the last 10,000 years have we formed modern societies including different forms of government, separate countries, states, cities, suburbs, and even unique neighborhoods. • Our lives can be divided into stages: infancy, childhood, adolescence, early, middle, and late adulthood and eventually old age. We all are born and we all eventually cease to exist and die. • Reproduction or more specifically the sexual act that can lead to reproduction is our primary, and most dominant, instinctual guide or motivation. Testosterone is our most influential hormone and greatly affects many of our individual behaviors. These behaviors can be modified by our other basic needs such as food, clothing, and shelter and sometimes by our individual spiritual needs. The male testosterone level, and therefor it’s influence, fortunately decreases with age such that by his late fifty’s most (not all) males can exert intellectual control over testosterones influence on their behavior. • Most of us do not ever consider ourselves mentally ill. We sometimes suspect we are not normal, but ‘mentally ill? Not me!’ However, mental illness affects all of us at some point during our life. Sometimes it is a temporary illness, but it can affect most of our life. Approximately 10-30% of us satisfy the criteria for a diagnosable personality disorder if we look hard enough for the signs, symptoms, and behaviors. This is likely to increase with time. These personality disorders are one of the ways the subconscious mind copes with childhood psychological trauma. • Almost everyone is psychologically traumatized or damaged as a child, most often unintentionally, by the members of their family of origin! Even those people we meet who we think are remarkedly well-adjusted. Most of these traumatic experiences are buried in our subconscious and we live our lives in a dissociated state that mimics enlightenment. Only a very small percentage of us work thorough the four stages of resolving our emotional traumas and reach the final stage of enlightenment. Our parents are the ultimate source of most of our emotional pathology! They, in turn, can blame their parents; the grandparents can blame their parents; and so on. This cycle is continuous and likely extends back to the origin of our species. The parentally inflicted psychological trauma or damage may have been intentional or, more commonly, completely unintentional. Unfortunately, the result is the same! Very few of us ever commit, have the financial resources, and the desire to do the introspective, extremely frustrating, extremely painful, and prolonged inner emotional work that is required to heal! To finally break the generational cycle of parentally inflicted trauma or damage. Instead, we tell ourselves and promise ourselves and our spouses (if there is one) we will be better parents than our parents were to us, without having done the necessary work to heal. A lot of people tell themselves their parents did the ‘best that they could.’ The few of us that commit to heal their inner emotionally damaged selves, unfortunately, often have already had children, unintentionally caused them damage, and now finally realize what has occurred. Ninety-five plus percent of the population could easily be classified as the walking wounded. It doesn’t have to be this way. Emotional healing leads to enlightenment. Enlightenment is beautiful and exhilarating. • Men tend age much more gracefully while women tend to age very poorly when it comes to sexual attractiveness. Unlike most males a female’s sexual attractiveness lasts around twenty years-- one fourth of her life expectancy. Women after age thirty-eight to forty years of age rapidly become sexually undesirable. By age fifty 99% of females are sexually unattractive to most males! This is a disconcerting observation! I easily can recall distant memories of intense sexual attraction for a specific woman when she was 20-25 only to find myself perplexed by finding myself sexually unattracted to the same woman by her different physical appearance when she had reached 38-45 years of age. Mother-daughter pictures confirm this observation. This 180-degree rapid change in sexual attractiveness is nothing short of profound and extremely depressing! Sexual attractiveness for women only lasts approximately 20-25% of a woman’s lifespan. Having personally witnessed this has significantly changed the way I interact with sexually attractive women. • In the USA our forefather’s chose capitalism as our economic system of trade and wealth accumulation. Because of the great depression capitalism was modified to be fairer to those society deemed less competitive and or those with a physical handicap. Thus, today we practice a modified capitalism. However, the conservative movement is rapidly leading us back to pure capitalism! The increasing financial inequality is a characteristic of this reality. • In the USA our predecessors also chose Christianity and to a lesser extent Catholicism as the predominate religions. In modern societies religion is best defined as a taught unrealistic belief system which then, for those believers (the faithful) serves as a coping mechanism for life’s difficulties and its inherent uncertainties. Organized religion strongly attracts the uneducated, the feeble-minded, the disadvantaged, those prone to authoritarian beliefs, sociopaths, con-men, and con-women. All forms of religion are susceptible to various degrees of radicalization. In this country we have chosen to call those affected by religious radicalization fundamentalist Christians. They tend to be a subset of a very religious group known as evangelicals. However, in predominantly Muslim countries, where the predominate religion almost always is Islam, those members of the religious group who have become radicalized are often known as radical islamist’s. Thus, in the USA we have a radicalized group called fundamentalist Christians and in Muslim countries we have a different radicalized group known as Islamic radicals. Lastly, the various religious dogmas tend to have their greatest effect on the young (immature secondary to age), uneducated, disadvantaged groups, and those prone to develop an authoritarian personality trait. • As hunter gathers we are motivated to form smaller groups often based on family of origin, marriage, religious beliefs, level of education, profession, wealth, special interests, and geographic location primarily to gain a perceived economic, spiritual and/or a reproductive advantage. • When our individual interests align we can easily form strong personal bonds. After these bonds form we can easily overlook newly identified character flaws. However, when our personal interests change over time the prior strong personal bonds can become strained and can even break. Afterward, these newly identified character flaws can no longer be ignored! Once close allies can with time become enemies! • Most, if not all of us, are capable of both very good and very bad behavior! Humans are after all great apes. We as a species can be barbaric to one another or extremely kind and commonly express all behaviors in between. • Every human being is unique! Genetics, nurture, physical attractiveness, circumstance, religious exposure, experiences, luck, culture at time of birth, education level attained, and wealth all contribute to various degrees to our make us unique. • The individual best defines for themselves a successful life. Often, a successful life for one person is not a successful life for someone else! • Each of us is presented with a unique set of problems throughout our lives. The problems are not equally dispersed. In other words, life is not fair! For me the members of my family of origin have caused me the greatest psychological harm during my life! I cannot overemphasize this. Most of this harm was unintentional, but still equally harmful as if it had been intentional. My father has Asperger’s syndrome and my mother has dependent personality disorder. Everyone except my sister has suffered because of their profound lack of parenting skills. My sister, 15 months older, inherited Asperger’s syndrome. After my sister and I both eventually left home, my younger brother was alone living with my psychologically dependent mother. This had a profound effect on him. He eventually became my mother’s surrogate husband and continued to live alone with her until his mid-thirties. Consequently, he developed a severe case of narcissistic personality disorder that has negatively influenced his adult life and ended any chance we as brothers may have had at an adult relationship. The disorder dramatically worsened and became malignant after my grandmother’s death in 2008 and immediately thereafter my DPD mother became his devoted enabler. I currently have a NO CONTACT policy regarding every member of my family of origin. This policy was implemented in 2014 at age fifty-three or four years ago and has been extremely beneficial to my mental health! I have had problems with C-PTSD, alcohol use disorder, victim mentality, validation of the extreme psychological trauma caused by my father’s relocation to become my neighbor, extreme animosity toward authority figures, and sudden unexplainable severe dysarthria. My mental health has significantly improved since initiating the NO CONTACT policy with every member of my family of origin (FOO). In other words, I have BROKEN AWAY from my parents and my FOO. I still consider the policy of NO CONTACT the best description of the relationship with my brother. Again, I cannot overemphasize the negative effect my FOO has had on my life! As more time passes the less I think about them. I have not, nor ever will forget, but I hope one day I think about them only a few times a year. To me the less I think about them the more AUTHENTIC I become. The ‘authentic me’ represents an EMOTIONALLY HEALED me and FREEDOM. • I define success for me as free-time, ability to continuously work on projects (usually associated with my home, but also art and intellectual pursuits), and ability for continued, daily self-reflection, and acquiring new skills. According to this definition I have attained my goal of living a successful life. However, it was NOT the life I envisioned for myself when I was a young man. I am only coming to accept it for what I have achieved during the last 1-2 years. D. Allen
Tina Shuangyu Wang Tina Shuangyu Wang from Wuhan China wrote on August 6, 2018 at 4:19 am:
Hi Daniel, I’ve been watching your YouTube videos recently. They were all so authentic that I felt like I finally found someone who think so similarly on this planet. Your documentary Open Dialogue of Finland psychology therapists is also a great inspiration to me. It’s never too late to see there IS hope and there are groups of people that are truly wise that can do things makes sense. Their existence can be a great inspiration.
Steve Filkins Steve Filkins from Midwest City wrote on August 1, 2018 at 2:02 am:
I came across your YouTube presentations and subscribed and find your talks very interesting and you are pleasant to listen to. Would be interesting to meet in person someday. You may visit my YouTube to hear me play piano.....I see you play guitar. Congrats on expanding yourself into new skills, understandings, and fun in life.
S P S P wrote on July 29, 2018 at 8:10 am:
Hi Daniel Your film about 'Healing homes' is just so very good. I really start to cry thinking about it! Will share it around
Meg Meg wrote on July 23, 2018 at 1:16 am:
Daniel, I want to thank you so much for sharing your experience. I happened to stumble across your video 'Why I quit being a therapist' on You Tube and what you say is absolutely spot on. I have worked as a counsellor for many years in the mental health field in Australia (private practice) and have suffered continuous burnout for all of the reasons you mention. I agree with your suggestion that listening (and the burden of helping) is something that should be shared amongst communities, not assigned to a percentage of people who are paid to carry the load of many. This is a flawed and unsustainable system. Like many others in this field, my passion for helping has morphed over time into an avoidance of my own life and the things I truly value - and yes, it is impossible not to take client issues home with you. I completely understand the notion that, as therapists, we assist the people we meet to fly free, often at the expense of remaining in a cage of our own making. Your final reason brought me to tears, because I have been trying to put into words what this career choice has taken from me (despite what it has given) and what it stands to take if I continue. I find myself sitting in sessions thinking 'but when is it my time?'. Well, I think my time is now. Thank you for your insight and encouragement.
Asma Sultana Asma Sultana from Toronto wrote on July 22, 2018 at 2:16 pm:
Hi Daniel I just wanted to say in brief that how amazing you are and I am feeling lucky myself to find you. I will write you a long message very soon, till then take care and much love for you. Peace! Asma