Emotional Flowchart for My Creative Process

daniel spins1) Feel excitement over new creative inspiration

2) Feel passion as I dive in and create first draft

3) Feel shame that draft is not good enough

4) Feel nothing as I self-protectively dissociate and forget about draft

5) Feel delight after returning to draft and discovering its value

6) Feel passion again as I dig in, edit, and revise

7) Feel fear and insecurity at idea of sharing draft with world — due to assuredness that it will cause me to be rejected

8) Feel relief and pleasure after I share draft with trusted allies

9) Feel sympathy for myself over realization that I was lost in inner child’s fear of abandonment by rejecting parents

10) Feel anger and rage over allies’ mild suggestions for draft

11) Feel nothing as I self-protectively dissociate and again forget about project

12) Feel a bit silly after I look at draft objectively and realize that allies’ suggestions were in fact correct

13) Feel powerful after incorporating allies’ suggestions

14) Feel dread and numbness upon realization that work is ready to share with world

15) Feel both thrill and terror as I share work with world

16) Feel relief that I did not die or implode as result of sharing

17) Feel regret and anxiety over various things I might have edited differently

18) Feel despair that sharing didn’t rescue my inner child as I secretly hoped

19) Feel pride that I accomplished work — and pleasure that some people liked it

20) Feel resolved at having integrated project’s lesson into myself, which signals readiness for new creative inspiration

15 thoughts on “Emotional Flowchart for My Creative Process

  1. Have you since grieved the trauma at the root of this fear? I know you talk about some trauma you are still trying to grieve. That would actually be a good video idea too. The stuff you’re still working on/stuck on.

    • Hi Brandon,
      Yes, I’ve grieved a lot of it — but some still remains… Hopefully it won’t last forever, but slowly I heal and grow!

  2. This is fabulous! I have been longing to do some writing about my journey and identify with every single step on yours… except that I’ve never posted anything publically… Maybe one day 🙂

  3. Excellent blog Daniel!! I used to paint a lot but then became a Clinical Psychologist and have been unable to produce anything for years… paradoxically, the world has become too concrete after studying and working in the mental health field…I wonder if you have any suggestions for creativity to be unplugged again? Keep writing and producing!!! I appreciate it!!

    • hi laura,
      i think having fun is the best way to lubricate creativity………..whatever it is that allows someone to have fun, especially good healthy fun 🙂

  4. I am SOO happy you are posting. Your open hearted sharing/flow chart gives tremendous insight into your humility and kindness. I wondered how you have been sustaining yourself since giving your videos to the general public. I have found boundless value in every media you have produced. These feelings are beacons of light to the inner children hiding out here in world wide webland.

  5. Thanks for this, Dan. I’m chuckling to myself as the pencil-sketched cover of the children’s book I’m writing is sitting on my desk and the very bad first draft is in revision. I’m at #7 on your flow chart. It’s good to know other writers do this.

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