Hello, I found your website and think you are essentially living your life in a good way. The type of things you do--making music about the most important issues, writing frankly and clearly about what concerns you, taking action once you\'ve identified an inner problem (not being afraid)--are some of the deepest desires I hold. Currently I am a college student growing more disillusioned by the day. I yearn to be free. To challenge myself. To throw my kite to the wind and finally embark into the ocean. My parents were not abusive and my childhood was very happy... But I still mirror them. It was not difficult emotionally to become who I am today. I have been blessed with advantages and I desperately want to break from my fear, the traps that will keep me in inadequacy like my parents. My life is following their exact pattern and I face a crucial moment where I break free and become myself or fail and become a copy. There is a deep well of curiosity and acceptance within me. I want to learn about everything. I want to learn from everything. I want to experience music and art and movies and make them as well. I want to meet people: good people, terrible people, weak people, strong people, those who are all that and more in one. I am studying for finals at top-ranking college in the US. My major is worthless. I have such a fortunate position and yet I think what I am doing is almost worthless... Here is something I wrote today~ All I want is a good job. All that I should want is a good job. All that matters is having a good job. Everything may be sacrificed to achieve the ultimate goal, which is of course having a good job. Lying, cheating, stealing, deceiving, hurting others, foregoing happiness, and moral failure are acceptable means to the end of a good job. We should lie, cheat, steal, deceive, hurt others, forego happiness, and fail morally in the uncertain pursuit of a good job. Hope should be chiefly in the aim of a goo djob. THE moral system is a good job. I have read about 2 essays, 2 blog posts, and watched 1 video of yours about hitchhiking. Yet I already understand you well enough to know that you will react to that piece the way I want people to react. Read, let it hit you, accept what it is. Accept. Thank you. I hope I break my fear. Declan