I listened to your story about trauma and grief or grieving. For me when I listen to your talk of self actualization .. it actually seems that the crying is a from of compassion for the wounded part. A form of nurturing of acknowledging the inner you. For me that is different grieving. Grieving for me is an expression of loss … for someone who is not there as in a death. In which the grief contracts the heart not allowing the person the experience expansiveness of their energetic which would allow them to experience where the soul is rather than where they are not. So perhaps the dissociation of your true self which was healed through crying was a way to open your wounded contracted heart with with compassion. Which represents an evolution and associated expansiveness in the recognition of realization your true nature of .