Everyone is His Own Hated Minority

[Written in 2004.]

Everyone is a hated minority in his family of origin. Parents who are not deeply healthy cannot tolerate a child being his own full, true self, which is how every child is born, and thus they must crush his most honest and radical parts. Parents were themselves crushed by their own parents, and in accordance with their own lack of healing must similarly crush each child they produce. For this reason each successive child rightly feels like a hated alien minority, despised by all until he gives up his truth and joins the ranks of the numb. Then he feels loved – though this is not a nurturing love at all.

Children go through hell to withstand the horror and tragedy of childhood. No one escapes this, though the majority are able to deny it. They blot out their pain of today and yesterday through the tools handed them. They create families which offer decades of diversion, build emotionally disconnected careers which drain tens of thousands of their best hours, disappear into addictions which chill their souls on ice, nurture physical illnesses which sponge their repressed emotions, and take medication of unlimited variety to neutralize every erupting bottled message from the soul.

To become healthy the child, now adult, must feel his pain. He must grieve his past horrors. He must side with his hated inner minority and battle the violence and cruelty in his now-internalized parents for his soul’s right to be. He must trust the justice in his inner voice and hold it close to his breast as he journeys forward. Truth lies in his breast, and always did. In the full light of truth, no child is a minority.

One thought on “Everyone is His Own Hated Minority

  1. I used to be a very quiet child since my early years and most adults would say ”what a good girl”. It was very convenient for my mother, father and all the adults around me. But I feel like my parents (God knows how) killed this life force in me. I refuse to believe that’s just how I am because it’s wrong.

    I like your comparison to hated minority. People from the left talk about marginalized and discriminated groups of people which is true and it’s great that they talk about that. But almost nobody talks about trauma publically. When I found out how profound trauma is I couldn’t believe people wouldn’t publically discuss it and actively look for effective ways to resolve this societal issue.

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