Feel free to sign my guestbook, and share your experience of my website or my work. Note: your email will not be made public, though if you share a link to your website that will be public. I also want to add that I cannot reply to people’s messages here. I’m really sorry about that!!
585 entries.
I struggled greatly with confronting my father a few years back about his emotional absence and the way he played the victim. As a holocaust survivor he felt \"entitled\" to play the victim and does not know how to take responsibility. Many felt i was brutal in standing up to an absent father that had \"suffered so much\". Sadly the children get lost and not heard when the perceived victim has manipulated others to believe their story.
Reading Daniel\'s book on Breaking away from Parents made me realise i had been on the right track all along. Intuitively it felt right if i was ever to heal and not continue to carry his unresolved trauma. Therapists that trained me felt this was unfair and selfish of me and i needed to find compassion for him, and in the process suppressing my own internalised feelings of shame and anger.
I think Daniel is a visionary who is way ahead of his time. I sense there are but a few people have done enough self development and healing of their early life attachment trauma to truly \"get\" him. I would say some of his views on parenting are even a tad radical for me, although i agree with much if not most of what he has to say. The world needs more like him who are prepared to make a stand against the narcissistic dysfunctional codependent sickness that is manifesting itself in our society. We have a long way to go, many generations before there is a seed change in humanity - but it has to start somewhere.
http://www.unspirituality.com
Hi Daniel, I am an author and devote of Alice Miller. You might find it interesting that her work triggered a full kundalini experience that lasted 5 weeks (the story of what happened I plan to write about at some point ... almost unbelevable)....this, after working my entire life on recovery from childhood trauma. I wrote a book entitled \"unSpirituality - Permission to be Human\" which makes the connection between the spiritual quest and childhood trauma. I wanted to connect and thank you for spreading the word....its nice to know someone cares enough to talk about it publicly since the thought of \"feeling\" the past in the moment is terrifying for most.
Thank-you so much for sharing your experiences in the YouTube Childhood Trauma. I took notes 😀 as it was exactly what I needed to hear. I have been off work on stress-leave and with a depression. I so want to be real for my two amazing kids and lessen their trauma. Thanks once again.
Hello Daniel Mackler,
My name is Dimitra Zervopoulos and I am very gratefully in therapy with Dr Ayme Turnbull. The only comment I\'d like to make for the time being is that I was UNable to subscribe to your blog using the subscription button you provided. Just wanted to bring to your attention.. I supposed I could just visit your blog periodically to read, but it would be nice to get email alerts of your postings.
I find your point of view extremely interesting; though certain ideas, disagreeable. I would like to post some comments soon to interact with you and other readers. Many Thanks for this website!!
Hey Daniel!
I was fascinated by the documentaryof the Western Lappland Open Dialogue Approach. Its so fascinating what is possible, once we shape shift our pradigm.
I just discovered this talk on an alternative treatment center in Canada.
It seemin Quebec....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=mmqT-4W4Cvg
As both a psychoanalyst and a psychiatrist, Danielle Bergeron is the director of 388, the Psychoanalytic Treatment Center for Young Adults Psychotics. With her psychoanalyst coworkers from the GIFRIC (Freudian Interdisciplinary Research and Clinical Intervention Group), Dr. Bergeron developed a new clinical process allowing patients to resume their academic and work lives as well as fully participate as citizens. This represents radical progress in the field, since the patients can gradually regain their autonomy, rather than be taken care of for life by institutions.
http://www.gifric.com/ecole-cercles-chicago.htm
With all this Information face. There is so much to deal with and to get clear on.
Where to find a inner guidance. Its easy for me to stay happy and alife. I have problems to deal with a long future planning. This drive me nuts.
Also with trusting relationship.
How to deal with deep genuine kinds of expressions? To Deal with this overload of possibilieties and impression? .... 🙂 I have tried so much from Diet, til Lifestyle, til reshaping my social life. There is so much possible. What i find hard, is the dealing with the dominant culture. How to face the expectation of the dominant culture? How to get the own life vision to reality? How to care for the own needs? How to keep something like deep inside genuine feeling and experience in this fast turning world alive?
Anyway thanks to you!
Best Wishes Niko
Hi Daniel,
I was really (positively) impacted by the family interviews you showed in the Healing Homes film. After reflection, I wondered more about the community of the families hosting people in crisis. Specifically, are they Christians or part of another spiritual community or support social network?
I\'m here in Seattle part of a Mindfreedom group as well as working toward the eventual goal of a Soteria type house. Thanks for your work on the films!
Michael
Hi Daniel, I just read your post on the post in Mad In America. I\'m glad I came across this. You mentioned that the post didn\'t have adequate visibility. This happens and the editors don\'t quite know why. It\'s possible, in fact probable, that this may be the result of hacking. My own blog has been hacked and I am working to fix this. My own writing in there was buried and then forgotten. I am a person whose voice was shut out completely until I relocated, so I felt that at least there should be compensation (something like Equal Opportunity). Unfortunately, when I wrote to Robert Whitaker I wasn\'t clear on this and in no way wanted to accuse.
My entries are still up there in Mad In America. Here\'s one:http://www.madinamerica.com/2014/12/trapped/ and here\'s the other:http://www.madinamerica.com/2015/03/journey-freedom-three-part-story/ I was heartbroken after the second one was published and then, almost ignored. Also, despite my repeated requests, my bio is missing. This was a glitch they\'re working on. I still feel hurt, though. If I were someone famous that everyone loves, I really wouldn\'t care. But I am a published author who was silenced, so I do care.
I will go read that post.
Julie
Hey Daniel, just stopping by to say hi. Hope you are doing well!
Hey Daniel,
It\'s nice to see one standing your ground and sticking to your feelings truthfully.
I saw your interview in the \'Borderline science\' show on Croatian TV.
I find these 2 people, Dr. Judith Wright and Dr. Bob Wright quite inspirational too. https://www.youtube.com/user/transformyourworld
Maybe you\'ll enjoy watching it.
And you\'re right, putting your thoughts in videos is much more effective.
All best.
Gracias por tu ayuda y aportaciones.
I have seen a few of your videos on you tube and am impressed by your thoughts and ideas. I heard what you said in your video about being concerned what other would say about your ideas. I think they are intelligent, caring and spiritual because when I listen to you my spiritual essence arises and want to keep hearing more. Thank you for you.
I\'ve come to some of the same conclusions as you. I stopped seeing my parents in my early 20\'s. It was a healthy move.
I also feel most therapists are not good enough (to use a Bruno Bettelheim expression) and the power imbalance makes that very dangerous.
Most are well-intentioned, but they know not what they do.
I agree about how common trauma is in the lives of children, and how oblivious adults are. It\'s hard when a person is sensitive to that when most people aren\'t.
Have you read Andrea Celezna\'s (or \'Celenza\', can never remember) paper on the power differential between therapist and client? It helped me a lot when I was dealing with a therapist whose only response to my needing to discuss the power imbalance was, \"I don\'t feel any power over you\". He was really good-looking.
Anyway, wish you the best with your valuable work!
Love your stuff Daniel and thanks for having the courage to expose how many psychotherapists / counsellors/ psychiatrists / psychologists and other practitioners haven\'t done the necessary inner work and healing to be best placed to help their clients.
Hi Daniel,
I wanted to thank you for your website and videos. I can understand how alone you are in expressing your point of view. I find that I reach a lot of the same conclusions myself, and my opinion is very unpopular (very unpopular, sometimes depressingly so). It is very scary to express my thoughts and feelings, but the fact that you have the courage of putting yourself out there inspires me to stand up for myself, and find the courage to be myself too.
Keep it up! The world needs more honesty.
Let\'s all work for life and truth, because, what else is there to do?
Caroline
Hello Daniel, I have posted previously in your guestbook and find your book Toward Truth essential in reminding me that the shame that at times is unbearable to deal with is very emphatically broken down by your approach and the reason for its origin. This validates me at my weakest and gives me strenght to continue fighting for my true self. Is there varying degrees of inner child pain and depending on its burial the defenses strenghten as we get closer to core
hi, i have alot of interest in what you say here on childhood trauma and the mind\'s own workings in response to it. speaking from personal experience, it is hard to know what a person\'s life could have been if they had not been exposed to that trauma (and even moreso to subsequent drugging), but i do have hope for being able to come out of the shell molded by psychiatry and the state.. people are responsible for their actions, and we deserve a brain and mind unaltered.
people have intrinsic autonomy from the moment they are conceived, and so we should value that to such an extent that we can know it will not interfere with other people\'s autonomy or will cooperate with them when able.
Hi and thank you. Though I interpret some of Alice Miller\'s work a bit differently on some issues I love your posts and her work. In fact with the aid of her website and your posts I experienced a major breakthrough in my 5 year long journey in therapy with a LCSW. I also found very helpful your commentary on AA. Through direct experience I came to the same conclusions about AA. Once I started to open and learn more about the origins of my wounds I could no longer sit in the meetings and leave my mind vulnerable to the constant contridictions that I heard from the other\'s speaking at the meetins. I was sober for 9 years at that point. I do know without a doubt that the 12 step program was a priceless aide in becoming and remaining sobriety for the first 9 years. It wasn\'t until I met with people on the job who mirrored and exaserbated all my childhood wounding that I finally found an amazing therapist who walked me through the past 5 years. Though I did have lot\'s of therapy those first 9 years, she was the first to point out tha I suffer from PTSD and she wasn\'t big on jumpiing to forgiveness like all before her. I couldn\'t even hear her the first three years. In fact I told her OH NO don\'t go there with me. I have already forgiven my parents. I myself am the mother of a 27 year old boy and a 12 year old girl, and they have different fathers. If you are interested I will tell you my journey with my children. You mention not having children until the traumatic wounding is healed. Yes I agree people who are likely to pass down the wounding should not have children BUT that will not happen. People will continue to procreate if for only the reason that most wounded people have no impulse control and make babies all the time. You talk about the time it takes to truly heal. YES it takes a whole lot of effort to heal making all the demands of parenting very difficult. For me I have decided whatever the price economically and socially I will do the work putting my daughter and my own healing first. That is easier now after I worked while my husband got his R.N. Long story! I find that it takes so much time and effort that I wonder how I can maintain this journey. At this point I have really begun to grieve and look at my past... I am telling you it is not easy and does not usually meet with the approval of society. I can\'t say well I am processing so much data and working so hard to heal that I am not presentable today. Instead I say oh I am having such a hard time with menapause etc. etc. Then I am met with all kinds of advice. In short the good news is I am a good mother I work every day to be fully present for my daugher and my daughter is thriving. She is well balanced, joyful and has reasonable self esteem. As I work on my boundaries I help her with hers. I listen to her fully and I thank GOD that my therapist has been an amazing mirror for me. My son is ok and it\'s never too late. I was not as narcisistic as my own parents. In fact I was much more loving. My son suffered the worse as I did abandon him in my addications and his father raised him alone starting at age 5, which I am grateful for. I returned to his life when he was 11. I did however manage to hold him a lot the first year of his life and I tried to be a good mother. It was really important to me from my first born on. I didn\'t want to pass down those horrible feelings but the repetiion compulsion and my addiction to alcohol and drugs was very strong at that stage of my life. There\'s so much I could share here and I am saying there is hope for people who really want to end the repetition compulsion. It does take a huge amount of willingness and faith however. Some days I spend writing crying etc I change appointments etc. then at 3 PM I put on a happy face and pick my daughter up from school. It\'s terrifying because I have a small busines I am trying to run but as of this past month I am letting go of anything coming before my healing journey. If I loose clients I will get other\'s later. I know thi work cannot wait. It takes a tremendous amount of faith and courage. The faith being that I cannot do this work, be there for my daughter and work full time. I finally accepted that about the situation. We live in a beautiful place...in AZ a wonderful place to raise a child. However this town seems to be filled with either corporate minded people or NEW AGE thought and of course there is a lot of belief in Spiritual BY-PASSING. In other words traditional therapy as they call it is in some points of view a waste of time and money when afterall you can do this healer or that method to a fast track healing of mind, body and spirit. Not in my case you can\'t I tried lot\'s of methods as Miller says a mixture of eastern and westeren religous philosophy and it all futhered and intensified my confusion. If you respond to me I will would be happy to give you further information on my journey to end the suffering in myself and to help my children be free of the wounding. My childhood was extremely abusive, and I suffered greatly. I was sexually abused by my father and many other\'s. I saw violence on a regular basis and my mother was young and extremely narsisistic very wounded herself. She was horrible to me.
With a grateful Heart~
Hello Daniel!
First I would like to thank you for sharing your work, it gives hope to a lot of people, including me
I was wondering which country/state in your opinion has the best/freest legislation concerning psychosis & schizophrenia, as involuntary treatment and forced medication can be really torturing
Kind Regards
Erik
Hi Daniel,
Thank you for sharing your experience. I would say a few people are on this or a similar path of realization with the parent stuff. I used to be a physician at one point for a few years, don\'t practice a while now. Nice to know someone out there has gone/is going through similar stuff too. Definitely is a process for me also. Might be nice to meet with you sometime (although I don\'t expect anything here, of course). Feel free to drop an email if you feel like it.
Thanks again for all the insight,
Madiha
Would SOMEONE PLEASE help me! I need someone like Elnora Van Winkle to help me through a bad crisis now -but all mental health practitioners now say pills like SSRI\'s are the solution, the ones available to me here in the Chicago area. I believe in her - and the likes of, say, Dr.Peter Breggin
Someone please contact me with suggestions,
Greatly appreciated yet needed
David F
I am very happy to have found your website Daniel. And, I immediately bought your book, \"Breaking From Your Parents.\" I can certainly understand your views and how they can be rejected by so many other people - parents and people in the mental health field. It\'s very unfortunate; however, I do value your thinking very much! Would love to meet you sometime in Manhattan too.
Hello Daniel,
How are you doing! This is sort of personal question but if you know something about it please respond!
I live in Finland I have been in talk therapy for about 10 sessions but that did not work so i have been to psychiatrist now. I just visited psychiatrist yesterday who prescribed me a drug named \"VENLAFAXIN\". He said this drug works best if you combine it with with discussion therapy, exercises, etc. and he said don\'t be afraid by internet horror stories and trust me and use exactly how i tell you (very low doses to high steadily) this is be very helpful for your depression (which i got 24 in Beck\'s depression inventory questions).
What do you think about this? Can you suggest me something, i would be very grateful.
Regards
Hello Daniel, My son has just turned 20 and we have put him in a hospital here in Atlanta over the Christmas holidays. He is having his first \"psychotic breaks\" wth varying diagnoses from BiPolar with Schizoid Effects to straight out Schizophrenia. Lots of history but we have also seen some hopeful signs as well. History of drug use.
I would like to believe that our son is suffering from being terrified and that dealing with core issue would help.
Where can we find some doctors here in Atlanta that think like you do?1) Healthy lifestyle, 2)dealing with core issues, 3)controlled environment, prepared for a cure that will take a long time, affordable. If not all 5, 3 out of 5?
Gary Brust, Parent, Metro Atlanta Area
Greetings sir, as a singer songwriter musician recording engineer producer etcetera, I found your video while writing a series for TV or FIlm whoever may pick it up,. But I wanted to thank you for explaining to me how fundamentally precise your methodology of explaining how to heal oneself from the abyssal within to the vast expansion of what it must have been like on the open range. Having to endure so many elements but at the same time attaining freedom and a sense of calm. Something I long for and struggle with every single day of my life. I am definitely my own worst enemy and I can tell you right now that I am in a world of despair but have the fundamental understanding that I can get through this. I know I can aspire to be and become whole once again. but for me, the algorithm of life seems to be so hectic and I\'m just looking for a normal EKG. Metaphorically speaking of course. I guess I hide behind lyrics and my music but when I record or finish writing a song it becomes very cleansing for myself. It\'s much like yourself keeping a daily journal with which by the way I do myself. I tend to live my life as a very big giver and rarely ask for any kind of help. All the money I\'ve basically made in life I\'ve either given away to help others unconditionally perhaps to my detriment and perhaps a major part of the reason or shall I say a component that makes me feel better. But in the long run I haven\'t healed myself and now very broke in more ways than just money. Thank you for the light I experienced this evening because I\'m a firm believer that light always outshines the dark and you are the embodiment of all that is good in this world and to take the time to help another begin to heal not just me but I\'m sure many many others, I could never thank you enough. I\'m never afraid to ask for direct contact and it\'s unfortunate in this world people have come to be very protective and understandably so but I\'m so old school when it comes to the healing of the soul especially and would love the opportunity to either meet or talk to you someday. I believe we share many of the same ideals and I am never too proud to tell another human being just how special they truly are. You are quite an asset to have in this world. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your compassion and incredible foresight to understand the human mind with all its complexities and imperfections. In closing, thank you for the time for putting together what you have because to me time is the most precious gift of all. Respectfully, Brian
Hi Daniel,
I\'ve watched a lot of your videos and find them mostly spot on. I resigned from my former career in finance and am undertaking a MSW, which I will complete next year at age 61, Most of my prior education in this area came from the human potential movement in the 80\'s, including Lifesping, Actualizations (Stuart Emory) and the Forum, all of which are very consonant with what you have been saying (in my opinion).
Two things I would comment on: You mention that in an enlightened person, the distinction between conscious and unconscious would go away. I think a better way to think about it is that the conscious mind has limited capacity, while the unconscious mind has many more \"parallel processors\" working all the time to perceive and interpret our environment. An enlightened person has the ability to focus on those unconscious parts at will (the separation barrier is not guarded by fear). But I have not met anyone who is able to be conscious of every judgement and evaluation that is made every second. Instead, the proposed model is to have the different elements of the self come to a mutually agreed conclusion about goals and objectives, so the unconscious processors receive clear and consistent direction to notice things and make choices that will advance the person\'s goals and objectives.
The second thing I would like to comment on is the notion that one should not have children until one has in a meaningful sense \"finished the work\" of dealing with childhood trauma. I think that is problematic for two reasons. The first is that the persons who would listen to that advice are likely much more advanced along the path of self awareness than persons who would not seek or follow such advice. So by telling those whose task is started but not completed not to reproduce, you would have the next generation be on average be more traumatized that the current generation who does not follow that advice.
I think the test is not whether one has achieved self-awareness, enlightenment, or however you phrase it. I would recommend that any potential parent that understands they have unresolved issues AND IS WILLING TO ADMIT THAT TO THE CHILD AND ADMIT TO BEING WRONG can be ready to have children if they can have some basic level of self control. Children can understand being enrolled in the family helping each other struggle with each person\'s brokenness in search for wholeness. If that fundamental truth is acknowledged, there is a lot of room for all to grow and be better than not existing (not being born). My fundamental mantra as a father was \"I\'m not better than you or smarter than you, and I may be wrong, but I have the responsibility to make the best decision I can, even though it may be wrong.\" The follow on was (and is) \"I am not in competition with you - I want you to exceed me in every dimension that you are interested in.\" To say this more (perhaps) in alignment with the language you have been using, the problem is not the trauma, or even the repression of the trauma. The problem is the lie that there is no repression. Children can understand and deal with damaged parents. It\'s vastly harder to deal with being lied to and having one\'s reality denied.
Regards,
Norman Chaleff
In responding to your comments in -My Intended Audience for wildtruth.com - and as a practicing counselor, working with children for the last 15 years, I thank you for voicing exactly what is missing in \"parenting\" and in the illusion people call \"reality\". Your work is unparalleled in the mental health field. If you look for allies count me in. Keep it up!!
Hello,
I hope this email finds you well! I attended last years
Mental Health Film Festival and watched a documentary that you
made \"Coming off Psych Drugs: A Meeting of the Minds\". We spoke after the Q&A and you gave me a DVD of your film. My name is Marina Landman, and I work at a peer-run program called Community Links. You can learn more about us here:https://www.facebook.com/pages/Community-Links-NYC/347550065345255?sk=info and you can feel free to contact me for more information. We\'re currently are working on a film screening and discussion showing \"Coming off Psych Drugs: A Meeting of the Minds\" on Sun Jan 25 1-4pm at the Brooklyn Central Library. I\'m contacting you to first make sure you\'re aware of this event which we\'re very excited about, and to also inquire
about your possible participation.Please contact me so that we can further discuss your involvement in our FREE event and so that I can share the event flyer with you. I can be reached at 917-572-1247.I really look forward to hearing back from you!
Dear Daniel,
It\'s another New Year at last (2015) and your video on \'Childhood Trauma and the Process of Healing\' is one of the best clips on that subject that I have ever seen. I count it as one of the true gifts to come out of a holiday season that brought home some of those childhood traumas when I least expected it, as some holiday seasons are wont to do. So thank you from the bottom of my heart for your work. It is a wondrous gift that you have brought into the world and I am grateful for the clarity of your wisdom. Namaste.
Hi Daniel:
I am impressed with all your work.