Feel free to sign my guestbook, and share your experience of my website or my work. Note: your email will not be made public, though if you share a link to your website that will be public. I also want to add that I cannot reply to people’s messages here. I’m really sorry about that!!
585 entries.
I get it.
You are Amazing Daniel. Love & Gratitude 🤩
Hello Daniel,
I really appreciate your videos. Could you one day do one on psychology of one-uppers? Especially in family settings? Also, parent favouritism of specific children?
Many thanks,
Ewelina.
Hi Daniel!
Thank you so much for being yourself, recording your videos and writing and selling your books! It helps me somehow, just listening to a person like you, as much as it can help in the absence of therapy and good people around or connections.
I've read "Five Weeks in China" and it was such a joyful encaptivating read! I also have another book to finish and I'm planning to read more of your books.
Hi Daniel,
Would you be able to do a video on the following topic. My brother is very verbally abusive and cold to his wife. Our parents raised us basically like livestock. I told her that I believe he treats her so badly because she must prove her love for him. If he treated her well and she loved him, that would prove nothing, but if he abuses her and she still loves him and does not abandon him, she must truly love him. It's the only way he can truly be sure. He will not put on what he sees as an act like he had to get a few morsels of "love" from our parents. In essence he is saying to our parents (and maybe himself) that they must have been wrong to not love him or think he was good enough because even at his worst, his wife still loves him. At his best, his parents did not, so he's not going to try that tactic again. It's a win-win for him because even if she leaves him, he will be able to blame it on the abuse, not on him being unlovable, and he can keep on denying his childhood trauma and pain.
You are so good at putting everything I think and feel into words.
One of my new favorite people!
Alafair xo
I appreciate your existence Daniel. You remind me so much of Peter K. Gerlach. In ways where your purpose lets me know that despite my emptiness, I still have myself.
Thank you for your video on "they did their best." The detail was very productive for me.
Moreover. I've recently begun working with a certain fast-growing therapuetic sector where the phrase is a platitude. It's sometimes followed by, "once you've properly done this work [and even "have an open heart"] then you'll understand." Which feels dismissive at best. But I'm only just starting out. So I'm really glad to refer to you.
Also, i would like to add to my previous comment, by Dianne, as u will see my previous comment below,
Schizophrenia and diseases like cancer do not actually exist.
They are a Construct, created by the medical system.
Because when we take it back in time, disease like schizophrenia and cancer barely used to exist. They were created by big pharma and the medicalization of every day Life.
People were healthier during the Renaissance . What does a Pet Cat do if it has Cancer? It goes and dies underneath a Tree. Theres no reason why humans cant be the same. Its all because Big Pharma wants to make money. Sociey has more than enough abaility to deal with peoples health problems without any medicalisation. The medical system had a ripple down effect on all the other industries in society, causing them all to become more corrupt, and cause climate change aswell.
It was not the medical system that caused people to get taller and healthier at the end of the 20th Century... It was Evolution Itself. As the longer humans have been allowed to live and procreate on the Earth, the taller and healthier they tend to get, over time. Alas, we have seen huge numbers of small and poxy children being born in the last few years. Really weedy and small. With the prolification of the medical industry.
We live in a world where someone without any pre existing mental health condition can enter the psychiatric system and get whipped on to loads of drugs, and MADE to have sever Schizophenia and get given all sorts of bad treatements. No it did not end or get better with the closures of the asylums. Iatrogenic Abuse is the Apple of a Doctors Eyes. It was when society started putting control of human peoples health in other humans peoples Hands, that society started to become less healthy overall, and weaker health patterns emerge.
Hi Daniel.
What i have to say is the height of iatrogenic abuse. And sorry im mixing that with having had a couple of wines, because i have to cope with the pain.
Basically, i am relating to your video clip the anti-psychiatry song and the one about psychiatric drugs. Very catchy.
Antipsychotics are responsible for over 99% of the psychotic behaviour we see in society and less than 1% of psychotic behaviour comes from an underlying condition.
Antipsychotics are so so so so adddictive, and even when there is an underlying condition, the medication is 1000 times worse. And it is JUST DISGUSTING.
The withdrawl mimics an actual underlying condition, so the person winds up in the system for the rest of their lives.
I was 20 years old when this happened to me. I was the most social, emotional, normal and friendly out of all my friends and family, yet i was the one that got put on all the Pharmaceuticals. There was something very healthy about me. And all it takes is that twinkle in a persons eye. Doctors want people to be healthy, they just don't want people to be healthier than themselves. Aint that the truth. And now im going through intensive involuntary primal scream therapy in a chair with blinkers, bits or wings of the chair that cut out my peripheral vision, so they can shut me down more easily. Because they were jealous of my healthy appearance and my good personality.
Subsequently, Another family member of mine was drastically iatrogenically abused. And it was a child. Doctors dont have the slightest bit of interest in the Welfare of a Child. Especially they do not care about the Welfare of an attractive child.
A doctor loves doing iatrogenic damage. Its what they thrive on. Doctors want people to be healthy, they just dont want people to be healthier than themselves. Aint that the truth.
Also i might add that..
Everything we need for Perfect Health, can be found in the goodness of Nature and the bodies own Immune System. Medical system and pharmaceuticals are Just Money Makers.
The most healthy people in the world are people that choose to abstain from the medical system, people who come from places in parts of South America and Africa, for isntance, where they have the biggest strongest bodies and healthiest whitest teeth. The pockets of the globe untouched by western medicalisation tend to still be the healthiest. Like parts of Peru or the Amazon.
Personally i think doctors should reconsider their vocation and become Butchers at a meat shop instead, selling bits of meat that they slice and Dice Up.
Just passing by to say hi! Ana, from Brazil.
Dear Daniel,
Despite my exceptionally limited exposure to media, I managed to stumble upon your YouTube video. That lead me to listen to more. As a life long truth seeker raised in endless dysfunction, I easily embraced all that you had to offer by way of insight. Soon to be 55 I find myself living alone (completely) for the first time in my life. It is absolutely liberating! I will be opening the vault, if you will, on all the journals I have written since I was 12 years old. My aim is to deeply reflect (much like I have seen you do on a few videos) the differentials in what I wrote back then and how the memories surface now. What were the things I said to myself back then to make it through and what are the things I tell myself now to make sense of it all???
I left my home town when I was 18 and never went back -- that played a huge part in my ability to heal my own wounds. Sadly, my siblings chose a different path, however, that allows me to gauge my own progress. At times life has felt exceptionally isolating, but my writing has been my saving grace for as long as I can remember. I feel even more inspired to explore these journals and absorb the insight about myself they offer me. It was so heart warming and endearing to listen to parts of your story. I share your vison of a world that learns how to process and digest our traumas and heal from them. I have been trying to understand my own trauma my whole life in an honest way. The journals prior to 1990 have been tucked away for many years, the courage to open them and face one documented tragic event after another is a little intimidating, but I am more than up for the challenge. There will be no great narrative to follow, nor am I looking to do some magnificent storytelling -- I am looking to put all that to rest and move on with my life as light and as enlightened as possible -- understanding who I truly am to the deepest depths I possibly can.
Thank you for sharing and allowing the insight from your experiences to nourish so many others. I appreciate what you have shared it touched my soul.
Take care.
Sincerely,
Bonnie
PS. I cannot even believe that I am writing this given my general avoidance of all social platforms. I just thought you, Daniel, should know how powerful and appreciated your words are. 🙂
Hey Daniel. I have come across a video, The two things that deeply psychologically change a person, this afternoon on YouTube. It was suggested to me because of algorithms of course. My "therapy" has been done alone, never any professional help with the exception of a brief sitting with a counselor because of domestic violence.
I have cried nonstop. You have given me the first resource that I truly understand or feel checks most of the boxes in my life. I feel like I am forever apologizing for how I am, for being wrong, for hurting others and myself, and disappointing, for leaving, for running, for overreacting, or not reacting at all. My "symptoms" are and have always been all across the board, one extreme to another. I have always done this and for most of that time, I had no clue why and I was just stupid, ignorant of facts. I did not know how what was done to me and what happened to me and my family, what LIFELONG sad consequences were in store for me. I will be 51 years old in two days, I too was born in 1972. I have only begun to learn all of this cause-and-effect stuff deeply damaged me. My story, what I am about to tell you, I never said to anyone until I was in my mid 40's except to my best friend. She and I have been friends since we were 10 years old and I told her only "I was molested by my Papaw" with no other details. That is the extent of my sharing and acknowledging anything that had happened to me. When I was 7 years old my Dad come in after my Mom caught him cheating, he was on something and drinking. She was packing to go to Granny's. He started a fight, got a gun, and waved it around carelessly. My Mom had my 5 years old little sister in her arms, asleep. He shot my sister in the head and killed her. My sister was dead, my Dad went to prison and my Mom, well she survived the best she could. She worked two jobs to raise me and she was not emotionally available anymore. We never spoke of this again. From this point on, at 7 years old my Dad's Dad, my Papaw started molesting me. He did this until he died, I was 15 years old. The next things I am gonna tell you all happened before I turned 18 years old. Following the 8 years of being molested, my first boyfriend I had was that same year at 15, just turning 16. He hit me for the first time just before I turned 16, breaking my nose. He did this many times. I did and said nothing. He terrorized me once I did break from him after he kidnapped me. He and his cousin strangled me, puncturing three holes through my neck causing me to hemorrhage. Thinking I was dead they were planning to throw me out and leave the state. He broke into another car before this final incident and had a gun and two bullets for himself and me. He rigged my car to blow up in the courthouse parking lot that malfunctioned and did not burn me and my Momma. He drug me through a department store, and forced me to buy the shotgun shells he said he was gonna blow my brains out with. There is more but you get the point. This went on until I was 17, and he went to prison finally. Then at 18, I went to a party with my bf and I was raped. I never said anything again. I have been abused by most of the men I have been with. Looking back now, I can see how I created a "fake" Angie, She was in survival mode and everything was ok. I never spoke up or wanted to stand out, Never knew who I really was, and still don't, I can honestly say, even when I was little and this is often asked at school, I couldn't see the answer. What do you want to be when you grow up? I have never been able to see my future, where, or what I want to be. When I broke, I broke. My family doctor who tried for years and knew my life and knew the women in my family all of their lives, predicted what would happen in my late 30's or 40's. He told me I will not be able to "handle it" being my traumas without help. He nailed it. I wish I had believed him and trusted him enough to get some help in my late teens. I have major trust issues and in both extremes, I have issues with trust. I give trust and love easily and without caution and I shut it down and stay closed off. After 18 I have had some life-altering things happen that have messed with me majorly. Being short about one of those, at 42 a kid pulled in front of me and changed my life in a devastating manner that not only broke me physically but played a huge part in the breaking in my mind and life. I was internally decapitated, my head severed from my body, C1 & Odontiod shattered at the base of my skull, and my back broken in two places. The independence I held on to fiercely was gone in the blink of an eye, 97% of the people with my injury, die. 2% survive and are paralyzed, 1% survive and walk again. I am in that 1% and I am walking. Being told by NC State medical people "I would never be a contributing factor to society again" after "surviving" all I have, I started a downward spiral. You mentioned having a closed circle that you allow to see the real you. I have only done this for myself in the past five years. I have all but 100% isolated myself at this point. No one deserves to or should want to put up with my bs. I get that and I stop it now.
Im sorry for rambeling on. I just want to say thank you for making me feel somewhat understood and not so crazy. I feel having both of you factors that deeply change someone happen at the same time for me and at a critical developmental young age, I have many more layers I am not looking forward to revealing but maybe I can do it. Your talk about trauma and when being continuously violated and not feeling noticed or heard affects a child is something I will be learning more about. This feels like what "split" that 7-year-old little girl that I was into the many I had to become. This gives me hope. I have resided my heart and mind. I will never be ok, this is just who I am. I can't be fixed and I will be alone. Leaving little room for hope but maybe I see a glimpse of some tonight.
Thank you,
Angie B.
Love to hear more.
Thanks for all your work; I’ve found it very helpful. Regarding “The Downside of Being an Attractive Woman “, I’d like to add to your notion that many don’t know they’re attractive is the fear that you’ll be considered vain if you acknowledge your beauty and the problems that come with it, or even if you wonder if you’re attractive. Then there’s the problem of mechanics, carpenters and other men one needs to do business with who ghost you because their wives/girlfriends might get jealous. It doesn’t necessarily decrease that much with age. Sinead O’Connor said she shaved her head to keep less attractive girls from beating her up out of envy. I’m glad I can comment here as I don’t want to create a YouTube channel just to comment.
Hey Daniel, wondering if you're doing any speaking engagements? Would love to see and hear you in person. Thanks for all your valuable insights and opinions regarding mental health.
Thank you for sharing your mind with the world. It's a true contribution to humanity
Hi Daniel,
I've only just discovered your YouTube videos. Bravo! They are so inspiring. I can relate very, very much to your experiences.
I love your authenticity. Your presence on the planet is such a grand contribution to all of us.
I have just made a donation using bitcoin. It's not a lot but hopefully it's enough to help you continue your great work.
Hi Daniel! I find your YouTube videos so interesting and appreciate your insights. I had a similarly difficult time growing up and was so close to breaking from my parents, but then my 80 yr old dad had to come live with me after he and his 2nd wife got divorced after a 30 years marriage. I live alone in a 2-bedroom apartment by a park, so it made sense logistically, but I'm feeling re-traumatized having him here. He's not overtly abusive (like my mom was) - he's just oblivious sometimes and I can sense disapproval of me being unmarried and without kids. It's subtle, but I sense this "something is wrong with you energy" I so specifically wanted to break away from. I see an arts therapist and am journaling and meditating, exercising, doing yoga, but the sadness just wipes me out sometimes. My dad seems to be experiencing slight cognitive decline, so having him move somewhere and live alone doesn't seem right, so I just wondered if you might have any thoughts about how to address the re-traumatization that can arise when having an elderly parent move in with you is necessary. Thank you so much for any ideas you might have. How can you break from them when they're elderly and vulnerable?
Hi Daniel, I just wanted to leave a comment to say thank you.
Because of your videos, I'm now unpacking the emotional incest from both of my parents with an awesome therapist.
Hope you are well and enjoying your life good sir.
Thank again with as much sincerity as I can muster within the English language.
Hi Daniel. ,,so glad to find you ,I'm a victim of my mother and grandmothers sexual abuse . Was raped daily at school by Moncioner Edward Kikle at St Francis DeSales school in Parma Ohio when I was 6 years old have spent my life long recovering from no boundaries .64 today you are my gift, your thoughts and words are healing ,thank you so much ,you are a life boat , my appreciation is sincere ...still on my journey of learning
hello, just want to say thank you for creating what you have, i have felt very alone in some of the topics you've put passion into and it is nice to see an applied human touch that i can resonate with. i hate to sound dramatic but i often wish to have never existed, in large part this is due to the value ive put into people and nature which seems to be as a whole, experiencing much more pain than what's at all necessary. Anyways im excited to read and watch more of your work, thank you for inspiring in me positive feelings.
Hi Daniel,
I just watched your video of why you stopped being a therapist. Everything you say is really spot on, you know the system, the entire trauma process, and yourself extremely well. I commented before, but I didn't see it posted. I just came back to say YOU ARE AMAZING!
God planned everything you went through to help so many people by you. I am so glad God gifted you with the power of empathy, compassion, knowledge, understanding, and LOVE. Please don't change (except for in the good sense).
Everything I hear you say comes so REFRESHING to me as VALIDATION of my entire life. You need to make a movie about your life! LOL. Your fans love you a TON!
From someone who also underwent Narcissist abuse (trauma bond) by a covert Narcissist. I struggle to make friends or emotionally bond with others intimately, due to trust, insecurity, lack of awareness of what is appropriate, right, healthy, or why. I was gaslit to never trust or believe what I think, feel, hear, OR see. It's been a long recovery journey, with just God and me.
Ever heard of Reformed theology? It answered ALL OF MY QUESTIONS concerning God with respect to evil in the world (issue of theodicy: "where was God in all of this?").
Hi Daneil,
I've been watching a lot of your videos and started reading some of your essays ....
Thank you so much for your generosity of the giving of your self through your work... Wow man... I am really glad that came around via my circuitous personal journey to recognize your presence ... I really appreciate what you have to say and can relate to a whole lot of it...
Anyway, I just feel a need to cut it short for now and not make this about me, and just reiterate how much I appreciate what you are doing for all of us here who watch and listen to you....
Kudos to you Daniel, I am so glad that I recognized you at this time in my journey...
Hi Danial! So last Friday I was talking to a social worker thinking she would help me and she basically told me I can’t work and that I should basically give up at least that’s how it seemed…can you make a video on how to handle toxic mental health providers? This just sickens me how someone could look me in the eyes and say this. Also before that I reached out to a mental health clinic and it’s been 5 days and I still have not heard anything. Sick! And they wonder why people aren’t getting the help they need and have to turn to themselves. This is rediculous at this point.
I was on a self guided retreat in the country looking at therapy videos to educate myself better on being a better pastoral counselor (am a hospice chaplain) and was just left reeling from my last patient who was being brutally terrorized by her narcissistic mother and now dementia patient...she shared that her dementia had been traumatic...the extent of the trauma bond and her dependence on saving mommy were scarier..then you popped up (I forgot the search word) and I have cried for hours and binged watched your vids. (I have never binged a you tube channel) for personal and professional reasons too...all I can say is 🙏 thanks thanks thanks, you helped me welcome my soul back and grounded me after a long season. Many blessings on your life, may your platform and voice resonate and call many out of their gloom and doom.
Hello All!!!!
First, this is a brilliant idea Daniel to have this be a part of your website. Not only do we have hours of content on youtube and this website from you as a resource but again through all you’ve done we have a connection to each other.
With this entry, I need to take a second to vent but first a little background, so, please bear with me. Thank you.
I started this journey of course at day one; when my mother was created by her mother and the egg that was to make me was made. I have always (as most humans) been a highly inquisitive person. As a child, I became eerily comfortable with being by myself. I would spend hours outside, in my room reading or staying up extremely late knowing school would follow in the morning. It wasn’t ever more than verbal assault, thank goodness. However, living day in and day out in utter chaos took its toll on me as a young human. Not only were my parents terrible in their own way, they were also extremely attached to the lds religion (or cult). So, during the week, I struggled in school, struggled to stay safe at home, and was reinforced every Sunday at church that my family was perfect and would be together forever in eternity.
That last concept really fucked me up (pardon the language, it’s the only word I can think of). My family will live together in the afterlife no matter what.
I recently watched your video and others about the concept of psychosis. When I experience those moments of psychosis, of course the idea that comes to mind is to run away.
The rant mainly consists of this: My mother and father do not want to know who I am. Not just from the family system trauma but also the religious trauma. My brain goes off in crisis and I never know how to deal with my current issues of daily life. I feel so alone. I do live with my mother and she tries, at least I think she does. Either way, with all that I’ve learned and pieced together, it so hard to have those conversations not just with her, everyone, even therapist (but who knows if they’re even good). I feel lost, I guess. It’s hard. Even harder to be positive and say good things will come. Could they actually come?
🫶🏻🐶
Absolute gold mine. Daniel, you've been a blessing for making the film about coming off medication. I believe my brother can cure bipolar naturally. Its inspired me. Secondly, you are so on point with your critique on psychotherapy. Seeing the brokenness of the medical system growing up + Osho's influence ('psychologists don't know themselves') + meeting an Indian Guru like Ram Dass did, has lead me to similar views on psychotherapy. It is time for a renaissance! I'm 27 and now feel the strong calling to become a psychotherapist but aiming to do so without all the red tape and acadix brainwashing. Big influence also has been Jiddu Krishnamurti, one of the rare ones who I feel has actually figured it out. Keep up the great work.
Dear Daniel,
Thank you gentle soul for journeying this world and making it a kinder and more sensible place. If I only ever get to say one thing to you, let it be thank you for laying down so much of the path for others to walk. Why reinvent the wheel? I just watch your videos and learn and build upon a great foundation.
If I only ever get to ask you one question: How did you find the courage to travel the world just you and your guitar? It seems like a scary thing to do!!! And if I get to ask you two, would you prepare any differently if you were a woman vs being a man?
Thank you Daniel!
PS. Not everyone who has children is stupid. Some are just unlucky. I was raped into motherhood recently and I had the choice to kill it or keep it. I didn't wanna kill him. He is beautiful 🙂 I am a good momma because I learn my best, am doing better than my parents did, and I know how to say I'm sorry when I'm wrong, AND I'm willing to discuss that I MAY be wrong sometimes. Some kids will be raised by pretty decent parents 🙂 This world is full of everything both good and bad, but one thing is for certain~we learn while we are here. I liked the lyrics in your one song that go... well, I am not good at verbatim because I remember the jist of things, but the lyrics were something to the effect of how it hurts down here but what is a life without anything bad ever happening in it? How could anyone grow much then? The bad stuff gives us something to build character with. Patience, gentleness, kindness... all that. So, yeah! Loved that song! I wrote one song once from start to finish and I even copywrote it for safe-keeping. It is also folk-y sounding. I agree, this music takes me home and puts me at peace. I like Celtic too!
Hey God Bless you, Daniel! Daniel Tender-Heart. That should be your nick name 🙂